Whenever i'm blog, it's either i'm bored or i'm down, and in this case here, i'm down. So f down. :(

Idn, if i'm tired or it's the time of the month because i get angry easily even at the smallest thing? Or is it the weather? Grr, idn. But, i think maybe it's because i'm more to the sad side. I don't know why i am sad and feeling all sucky when i was the one who made all of this shits happen? Shouldn't i be happy that it turn out exactly what i want to be? But why am i not and instead enduring this every sec of torment? No matter how busy i am or when i;m alone, my thoughts are always filled about you and you, i wonder if you still think about me though. There you are trying so hard to move on and here i am, picking up the pieces that i've made a mess with. I dont know but i want to cry so f much, but whenever i let myself to do so, i just remind myself that it ain't worth it and it's better i just smile and forgo. Yeah, ain't worth it because i'm the cause of it! :/ Yes, i'm guilty, guilty for treating you so bad when you were here. But i had to do what's best for me. I had to push you away eventhough you're very tempting. By doing what ever you're doing now shows that you are not man of words, so was my step correct or wrong? Or are you trying so hard to get back at me? You don't understand, because you don't want to. No matter how suck it is to be this way, i gotta be. I gotta live the fact that i made this mess, and i have to clean this up. :( but i miss you though. I really miss you, i hope you do so.