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October 11, 2010 / 2:36 AM
Yawns,Yeah i know,i probably should like start sleeping nw, as my class in in the morning, haah! Just a short post? I hope, heehs. As far as im concerned, today is monday and im sure its gonna be blues, but looking at the bright side, its one day closer to be and meet my boyf, heehs! Yeah, we're turning 30 months on tuesday, that will be, 2 yrs 6months 3 weeks 6 days today! Whoa, that looks so long to me. Heeh!I'm glad that no matter what we've gone thru, we've managed to get this far, and i hope we would still be hand in hand, in years time no matter what obstacle that's coming in our way. I know, this sweet sweet thingy going on nw, wont be lasting long, i wished we could be like this forever, but like P.Ramlee song, "Sedangkan lidah lagi tergigit, apa lagi suami isteri", something like that, but of course he's not my husband lah dey! I hope no matter what, he would put all his effort in this rship like how he puts when he wants to play soccer, you know what yang, i like you better when you're like this. Do you know, when you're like this, i feel peace, feel less stress that i could actually sleep easily without anything that's bothering me. I love you yang, i've always loved you! I really hope, as for now, our rship would take a different direction, i really wanna change, i really wanna him to change too, not for our own expectations but for our rship gd. There's lil things in our rship that needs improvements,and i hope we both could work that thing out. I have a lil fear each time when he's nice too me, i have a lil fear thinking what if i'm starting to believe him, and he's cheating on me. Idn, but i hope he won't.
Some girls, are just lucky. For me, i dn if im really lucky. Suhaimi is really a nice guy, idn if my flaws are actually the reason to our sinking rship? Idn. Sometimes, i feel i have failed as a gf, but im not sure. Im trying my best now, to be the best for my other half, and i hope he does too. I was bloghopping when i come across this girl's blog. You see it's funny when you alr have someone who has loved you so much and yet you choose to leave and go back to someone in your past. Do you know that many girls envy being in your place? Not all ppl in rships are happy. Some just are left hanging there, and some just are trying hard to make their other half love them as much as they do. Sigh, but this is life. You either get cheated,dumped or left. Bleargh..Love is supposed to be happy, but it seems its the opp way.
Oh yeah, i want so much to go Universal studio, seeing how others are having fun with their other half, makes me so jealous. The sad thing is, he's working on my special day, and i have been hinting at him, to take leave on my day but it seems he didnt catch all tt hints. But its okay, im still not sure if i still wanna celebrate my bdae, i shall have my own celebration somewhere, alone. Its not pathetic, but ive never really been enjoying my birthday, when i looked at how others spend theirs, especially my girlfriends, oh i wish i was in their place. I just wanna be happy, on 23rd. But i guess that's too much to asked for. :) Nvr mind, life will get better.
